School boys

Last Thursday I worked my usual detention shift and the room was packed with bad boys. I made them face forward and stay quiet. That is the rule anyway but I have to enforce it because they will do anything to get around the rules. This particular day included a very brazen boy named, Smooth Talker.
Smooth Talker was just a few desks away from mine so I could keep an eye on him. For about an hour, he drew loudly on his paper and then would stop to stare at me. I told him at least 4 times to open his book and read. Finally, I said:

"Why are you staring at me??"
"Because you look good! I can't help it. You are nice to look at!"(The class erupted in laughter)
"What??" I exclaimed. (Of course I could not help but laugh and that did not get those kiddoes quiet at all)
"Where do you live Miss H?"
"Far away from here. It's no where you could ride your bike to."
"Well, I got friends who can drive. I will just get my homies to drive me over there."
"Do you live close to Miss K?"
"Yes."
"I can come see y'all."
"And what would you do if you came to visit us?"
"I would cook y'all dinner, play some Marvin Gaye, light some candles..."

By this point, everyone was having a ball. Not only did I have Smooth Talker trying woo me but I had another boy entertaining the class with his Bernie Mac stand-up. Any question I responded to, he accused me of saying that all black people are that way!

Smooth Talker: "Miss Humphrey, do you date black guys?"
I just smiled.
"Are you single?"
"NO!"
"When I get older I am going to have a bunch of babies...like 200... "

Needless to say, detention was not much of a "punishment" for anyone that day...